A very happy autumn to all you
eager young fiction devotees! Isn’t the air bracin’ this mornin’?
Doesn’t it just make you want caper with abandon and fling yourself
into a pile of those pretty fallen leaves like you did when you were a
little ’un? Ah don’t know about you, but your darlin’ Ms. Flanders has
plans after class is ovah!
Now that school is finally back
in session, Ah trust that y’all are champin’ at the bit to get back to
the contemplation of the Sacred Laws of Fiction Etiquette. Let’s jump
into today’s business with both feet, so to speak, so Ah can head out
back of the barn for a restorative draught from the sti—er, spring!
The letter, please, darlin’. And
don’t be draggin’ your feet or Ah shall be forced to provide the
motivation you seem to lack, missy.
Dear Ms. Flanders,
I am a writer of some repute,
and many of my colleagues are writing—horror of horrors—fiction. I
can’t conceive they are doing anything other than telling lies and
profiting from it! I ask you, is it ever proper for a Christian to
write—and sell—stories that aren’t true? I mean, isn’t Christ the way,
the truth, and the life? How can there possibly be
a place for fiction in the Christian market? What kind of Christian
devotes precious time to perusing falsehood—indeed revels in it? Isn’t
that a contradiction of our calling to be witnesses to the truth?
Abundantly S. Righteous
Dear Ms. Righteous,
Ah do presume you nevah, evah
watch TV or movies, do you, honey? Ahem! Do you mean to accuse our
precious Lord and Savior of bein’ a liar? The Scriptures tell us that
Jesus always taught the people by tellin’ stories, and he was God in
the flesh, wasn’t he? Or, perhaps, you think every one of those
charmin’ tales recorded in the Gospels was absolutely factual in every
Seems to me the Bible you claim
to revere includes stories as well as history and poetry and prophecy.
Why, it’s a veritable treasure trove of genres! Seems to me also, baby
doll, that Jesus himself told his disciples not to judge others, and
that while man looks on the outward appearance, God looks on the heart.
So unless you can see into the hearts of your fellow writers and know
exactly how the Holy Spirit is leadin’ them or workin’ in the lives of
their readers, sweetheart, Ah would advise extreme caution in usurpin’
the Throne that belongs to the Almighty.
Well now, didn’t that just shut
her mouth? Ah am just tooooo good for mah own good!
Does it seem a mite warm in
here, chillen? No? Perhaps Ah am simply havin’ one of those power
surges ladies of my mature years are subject to on occasion. Ah know
just the remedy to set me to rights—a long swig of that energizing
sweet water from the spring out yonder.
Y’all behave yourselves, now,
and I’ll see you next month for more discussion of the Sacred Laws of
Stories about demons seem to be steadily growing in popularity. On the
other hand, so are stories about the Amish. What gives?